6 Months!

Hi, I just wanted to update to let you know that I'm still breastfeeding and loving it. Cam is now just over 6 months old and has started some solid food but he's more keen on his 'boobah'. He has two teeth which is another issue entirely but I have been so blessed as to have no issues regarding supply or what not and our BF relationship is perfect.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 
 

Exclusively Breastfeeding

I'm now exclusively breastfeeding by the breast and no longer pump! It took a lot of strength to get past my fears and anxieties surrounding supply/latch/upsetting him/not knowing how much he's getting/losing routine/etc but I did it. I just figured I'd let him latch how he wants to and he gulped and gulped and it wasn't hurting so I was too happy! I haven't looked back.

I spoke to a breastfeeding counsellor in my area who helped so much. She also suffers from anxiety and understood my need for control. She gave me things to focus on (his output, etc) that have really helped. It's so much easier and I hope I can BF for a very long time.

Cameron loves it and no longer gets as painful wind. He always smirks at me from the breast and will latch and unattach himself. It's so beautiful. I started this when he was a couple of days shy of 4 weeks and now he's a couple days shy of 8 weeks. It took a month and lots of determination and effort but it was well worth it.

Thank you to everyone who helped me get to where I am with BFing. I'm so happy.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

SUCCESS!!!

I have successfully relactated!!! I'm now producing as much breastmilk as Cameron needs!

It was a difficult 17 days but so worth it!

I've had a difficult past couple of days with a breakdown, dr visit, a ute reversing into my car, Mike melting the $85 breast pump kit to the pot and filling the house with fumes & the hospital grade pump I've hired stopping working (half way through me pumping so my nipple was sucked in there like crazy and I had to pry it out!!!)

Let's hope my luck turns around?

This is by no means the end to my journey. Now it is a matter of maintaining my supply and juggling offering the breast and exclusively expressing. I also have to wean off the medication I am on slowly. I have a new pump on the way that I've bought (I'm excited! A Medela Pump In Style Advanced) so here's to the rest of my journey.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

Day 16

Quick stats

- I'm now producing 625 mL in a 24 hour period
- All up thus far we've spent over $400 on my relactation journey (for medication, herbs, pump hire, membership, SNS, etc)
- I spend roughly 4-5 hours a day pumping

Update:

He is refusing the breast and cries whenever I encourage it. Then I cry and start to hate myself and the whole process.

I've made the decision to exclusively pump and bottle feed him while mimicking breastfeeding (holding him against the breast, etc) and just use the breast as a comforter when he is OK with it.

It gets much too stressful. My PND and anxiety sky rocketed trying to get rid of bottles. I can't stand him crying. I physically and mentally cannot stand it.

I should say that for the week I breastfed earlier it was easy. I had a great supply and he latched well and never cried. So I find it soooo hard. Too hard.

I feel enormous amounts of relief just thinking about letting go of that pressure. It's not a simple decision and that's why I know that it's too much. It means more money (to buy a pump because long-term hiring will be too expensive), time, effort etc but that's how distressing I'm finding BFing. I love my boy too much to try and force this on him.

I'm hoping to give Cam a happy feeding relationship. I'm certainly enjoying, playing and bonding with him but not to my full ability and I don't want mornings like yesterday where we both just cried.

I knew that relactating was a risk factor for triggering more difficulty surrounding my PND and anxiety. I even tried twice earlier and decided it wasn't worth the stress but now I'm here and doing great.

I'm going to attempt to pump exclusively and bottlefeed him my milk and hope that I can do this for as long as possible. At this point it isn't too stressful to me and I really love that he is getting my milk. That being said I've only done it for 2 weeks.

My hubby is fully supportive of my exclusively pumping and obviously I'll make my breasts available to Cam if he is interested in breastfeeding, etc but I am not going to force it (hard to word that differently).

I know deep down I'm hurting from not being able to BF as normal. But I'm more than happy to pump exclusively and breast-nurture him as much as he'll allow me to. I simply can't force it and love our relationship as it is.

He's still looking into my eyes, cuddling close to me, feeling my skin, hearing my heartbeat and being nourished by my milk. There's no stress. There's more work but I'm not stressed. I actually really enjoy seeing my milk collecting and I'm getting soooooo close to his demands now!

I saw my GP yesterday and because I'm on such a high dose of motilium I was going to have to spend so much money to keep taking it so she did a bulk (one months worth) script for me and the pharmacist gave it to me for over 40% what I usually would pay! God is on my side, I tell you what!

I talked to my doctor and we agreed that it is best for me to get to a point where I have an oversupply then very slowly wean off the motilium until Cam is 8 months old where hopefully I won't be taking any. I'm giving myself mini goals with pumping exclusively because it isn't easy. My first goal is to get to when he is 4 months (2.5 months away). Wish me luck!

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

Day 10

I hired a double electric pump yesterday night because hand expressing was doing my head in. Now I have a great routine and feel so confident!

I'm expressing every 1.5 hours and getting around 25 mLs each time (over night I only expressed every 3.5 hours... my alarm didn't go off again!) which means around 400 mLs in a 24 hour period! That's about half of what Cameron is drinking!

So now every 2nd or third feed is my EBM. You can only imagine how great that makes me feel! Now that I feel confident that my supply is increasing I am going to focus on feeding him only at the breast (as much as possible alone then with the SNS and I'll continue pumping every 1.5 hours)

It was awesome talking to one of the BF counsellors from the ABA (who I hired the pump off) - I felt so empowered. I really feel like I'm getting somewhere now. It's day 10 and I've gone from drops to half of what he needs!

This morning when it had been 3.5 hours between pumping I got 70 mL! Sometimes that is all he has at a feed!

My hubby made more lactation cookies (man, I'm putting on weight eating these things! LOL) and I'm still waiting on the Goat's Rue.

I'm so happy right now.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

Day Six

Last night and today I took it a bit easier and only expressed every 3 hours on average and didn't use the SNS until this afternoon.

It was a good decision because I got some ok sleep which seems to have helped my milk supply a touch.

Mike also made me up some more lactation cookies which is awesome and I bought some fenugreek tea which is yummy.

I've ordered some Goat's Rue from a herbalist which should be here in a few days and sounds great. A friend is also sending me some fenugreek and blessed thistle capsules which I'm looking forward to taking as I've heard they're best used in combination.

Yesterday Cammy spent almost an hour at the breast all up which I think is so beautiful. Today he's been breastfeeding for comfort more than anything which I love.

I left the SNS at my sisters so tonight I'll be pumping 2.5 hourly and will use the SNS as much as possible tomorrow.

I'm hoping to slowly stop the use of bottles over the next week. I'm just aiming to do it one bottle at a time. It's hard because he's used to it and so am I!

Every moment that it feels too hard I just think about our breastfeeding relationship and how amazing it is going to be. Today my bubby is one month old and that is so early in the scheme of things. I'm setting myself up for an easier future.

I don't just want to breast-feed my son; I want to breast-nurture him.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

The Not-So-Great

The hard things... just being realistic here:

- Cammy has small amounts of oral thrush which has consequently given me nipple thrush which HURTS.
- Cameron has bad wind pain quite often which can coincide with feeding times and make feeding him without a bottle (by breast and SNS) really difficult.
- I am not getting enough milk to pump with my electric pump so every pumping session (2-3 hourly) is done by hand... which is more time consuming.
- Using EBM is harder because everything has different times it can be used by (frozen, partially thawed, thawed, room temp, etc) and it's hard to have a crying bub while you stand around waiting for breastmilk to thaw under a running tap.
- Fenugreek and milk stimulation makes me bleed vaginally. So I've been bleeding for over a month now.
- The medication, herbs and SNS have cost me $150 thus far. Thank goodness for the generous women who have donated breastmilk to me so I haven't had any cost other than travel with regards to that.

This morning has been hard. I'm still being as positive as I can but I'm tired... my breasts ache... I don't know if my supply has increased much because I've been using the SNS (it was hard this morning... he just kept unattaching and crying due to wind pain and getting frustrated with the flow) and I'm worried that Cam isn't getting enough milk.

He's happily asleep now so I know he's alright but I just want someone to come to me from the future and tell me that this will all be worth it... my supply will meet his demands and I'll be fully breastfeeding him in no time... because sometimes it really doesn't feel like it's going to happen...

It probably doesn't help that I'm home alone today (on a Saturday... hubby is at work) and I just want some nuturing myself.

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

The SNS

The SNS has been a success so far. The first feed with it was BEAUTIFUL. I cried. He latched on and suckled at each breast for 10-15 mins each before falling asleep on my breast with a contented burp and sigh. It was perfect... I can't wait until it is alllll me.

The second attempt was much more difficult because it was timed with a difficult period of the day where he gets bad wind pain but it was a success when he wasn't in pain.

Over night I didn't use the SNS but had a great night with Cammy. He latched onto the breast at each feed and took each breast for 5-10 mins before needing a top up with EBM. The 5 AM feed was all me - he fed at the breast then had 30 mL of my EBM. He even frowned when I got a bottle LOL

Because he is suckling I am now getting a more definite let down that I can feel and I know he's getting more than usual from the breast as I hear the little gulps more frequently now.

Also, my breasts look fuller, feel fuller and ache sometimes! & I'm getting hungrier and thirstier like I used to when I was initially breastfeeding... WOOHOO!

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

Day Three

Well over night I only pumped every 3 hours or so, so I got larger quantities but it wasn't optimal (thank goodness for my amazing supportive husband who took over the two night feeds despite needing to get up for work in the morning!). However, my supply is increasing! Slowly but surely!

I went and picked up some more EBM for my baby boy from a lovely Mum a fair drive away and when I got there she had made some lactation cookies for me! They're super yummy and they are meant to help increase my supply too!

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Lactation Cookies!

* 250g of butter
* 1 cup sugar
* 1 cup brown sugar
* 4 tablespoons water
* 2 tablespoons flaxseed meal (linseed meal)
* 2 large eggs
* 1 teaspoon vanilla
* 2 cups flour
* 1 teaspoon baking soda
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 3 cups oats
* 1 cup or more chocolate chips*
* 2 heaped tablespoons of brewers yeast

·Preheat oven at 180 degrees C

.Mix together 2 tablespoons of flaxseed meal and water, set aside for 3-5 minutes.

·Cream (beat well) margarine and sugar. Add eggs one at a time, mix well. Stir flaxseed mixture and add with vanilla to the margarine mix. Beat until blended.

·Sift together dry ingredients, except oats and chips. Add to margarine mixture.

·Stir in oats then chips.

·Scoop or drop about a heaped teaspoon of mix onto baking sheet, lined with baking paper. Leave plenty of space as they will spread.

·Bake for approx 8-12 mins depending on size until browned.

* NB Chocolate can cause colic in some babies through breastmilk so best to omit until you know either way.

How do they work? The cookies are high in omega 3 (through the eggs and the linseed/flaxseed meal) which is proven to boost breast milk supply. Brewers Yeast is also meant to be a milk supply helper, and is high in protein.

Brewers Yeast and Flaxseed/Linseed meal can be found at health food stores.

Add your own subsitution for chocolate if you wish - e.g dried apricots, mashed banana, almonds/cashews, coconut, etc.

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I'm now getting around 12 mL all up from both breasts if I'm expressing every 2 hours (I did get 24 mL at one expression because it had been a bit in between travelling). Cameron is more than happy to suckle at the breast for a decent amount of time now and I think the SNS will make this even more great.

Speaking of the SNS, it has been express posted to me today so I *should* get it tomorrow which will be so great! I am doing as much research about it as possible!

I'm still only hand expressing as the electric pump isn't very effective with so little milk and doesn't really mimick a baby feeding as well as I can with my hands.

Briefly, what I do is wash my hands before I start. Then, I place my thumb around 4-5cm away from my nipple and my fingers below so that they form a "C" around the areola, and squeeze my finger and thumb together.

I use a sterile container to collect the milk and syringe it to measure it. I used to just discard of it once I'd finished because of how little I was getting but I'm starting to collect it and feed it to Cameron at the start of his feeds which makes me so happy!

Cameron is having around 650-750 mLs a day at this point and I'm able to express 120 so that's pretty impressive :D

OH and also, my breasts have begun to feel more full as I'm approaching my 2 hours since pumping and they can ache! So exciting!

I'll post again tomorrow - hopefully with my first impressions of the SNS!!!

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 

The Beginning

Yesterday, I began my relactation journey after stocking up on medication, supplements, information and gaining support.

You see, I have an almost-4-week-old baby boy who has formula fed since he was one week old. I was hospitalised with severe anxiety attacks and insomnia when he was 6 days old and was not in a state to breastfeed so he was given formula feeds.

I then allowed my milk to dry up as I focussed on getting better mentally (I have postnatal depression and anxiety)

Now I'm doing great and so is he but I so desperately want to breastfeed not only for the benefits to him but because I loved it.

So I'm attempting to relactate. I'm eating well and drinking loads of fluids, resting well, nursing him as often as possible (he'll latch on but gets frustrated because I'm getting next-to-no milk).

I'm taking fenugreek, motilium and am pumping regularly. I'm in contact with a lactation consultant and am waiting on a Supplementary Nursing System which should come Friday or Monday.

Some beautiful, generous Mummas are donating expressed breastmilk to us as well which means that my son will no longer have formula and will get all the benefits of human milk while I get my supply up.

I'm currently hand expressing every two hours & pumping each breast with an electric breast pump for 15 mins all up straight after. It's a time-consuming process whilst caring for a new baby but I'll do ANYTHING for the ultimate reward!

I'm feeling SO positive and excited! I already feel like I will be a success although I know it will take a lot of hard work and persistence.

Today he was on the boob suckling despite the fact that they're dry (I had just hand expressed the small amount that I do get)!!! He suckled for 10 min on my left breast and 5 on my right before falling asleep.

He even unattached himself, yawned and reattached himself a few times. He's so amazing!

I also called the company that I've bought the SNS off and they're express posting it to me so that *fingers crossed* it'll come on Friday so that I'll have hubby here for the weekend to help us get used to it.

Yesterday I was only expressing 2 to 4 mL all up from both breasts every 2 hours and today I'm expressing 5 to 7 mL Celebrating the little things! Oh, and while I was wearing him skin-to-skin today (as always!) he cried and I leaked on him!

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If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope. 

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live .com.au)

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous