Friday, January 29, 2010

The Not-So-Great

The hard things... just being realistic here:

- Cammy has small amounts of oral thrush which has consequently given me nipple thrush which HURTS.
- Cameron has bad wind pain quite often which can coincide with feeding times and make feeding him without a bottle (by breast and SNS) really difficult.
- I am not getting enough milk to pump with my electric pump so every pumping session (2-3 hourly) is done by hand... which is more time consuming.
- Using EBM is harder because everything has different times it can be used by (frozen, partially thawed, thawed, room temp, etc) and it's hard to have a crying bub while you stand around waiting for breastmilk to thaw under a running tap.
- Fenugreek and milk stimulation makes me bleed vaginally. So I've been bleeding for over a month now.
- The medication, herbs and SNS have cost me $150 thus far. Thank goodness for the generous women who have donated breastmilk to me so I haven't had any cost other than travel with regards to that.

This morning has been hard. I'm still being as positive as I can but I'm tired... my breasts ache... I don't know if my supply has increased much because I've been using the SNS (it was hard this morning... he just kept unattaching and crying due to wind pain and getting frustrated with the flow) and I'm worried that Cam isn't getting enough milk.

He's happily asleep now so I know he's alright but I just want someone to come to me from the future and tell me that this will all be worth it... my supply will meet his demands and I'll be fully breastfeeding him in no time... because sometimes it really doesn't feel like it's going to happen...

It probably doesn't help that I'm home alone today (on a Saturday... hubby is at work) and I just want some nuturing myself.

If you have found this relactation blog as a result of currently relactating or considering relactation; I hope this serves as inspiration for you and hope

Don't hesitate to contact me (racheous [at] live

You can see how we are doing now at Racheous 


  1. No-one can tell you if it is all going to work out that way - but at least you will know you gave it your all. You are doing a fantastic job.

    Remember - breastfeeding is often hardwork for the first 6 weeks even if you aren't relactating. We went through breast refusal from the very beginning (after a traumatic birth and SCN etc). Will had formula, then EBM, then eventually fed from me with nipples shields. It was hard work - but the rewards were worth IMO.

    Are you treating the thrush? Use the meds on you and him AND treat all bras/sheets/dummies/teats etc with a vinegar or canesten/dettol rinse (oh I remember that pain- ouch!)

  2. Yes, I'm treating it. That's a good idea about the canesten rinse.

  3. You are amazing! I am sending nurturing vibes to you! Here is an article about relactation that I thought was awesome and that you may enjoy.